THE ATLATL PSYCHIC

by Dennis Lantz
11/10/2005

"I can see it clearly... there is no doubt,"
Said the atlatl psychic to his friend.
"You're on a roll... you'll do quite well - 
Your crappy luck is near an end.
 
"It'll take some magic to counter the curse
That Reg Tully placed on you...
But I'm sure that you can break it -
Here's everything you have to do.
 
"Just shake these rattles and dance about
And scream Ooga Booga! to the skies...
And it won't hurt to paint your face
Or plug your ears and cross your eyes.
 
"Turn 'round three times and clap your hands
Then kneel and rub the scorekeep's feet...
Now kick up your heels and sing Auld Lang Sine,
But make sure you keep a proper beat.
 
"Next count backwards from seventy-three
And smear some chocolate on your fist...
Name everything blue that you can see
And that snake surely needs to be kissed."
 
"Will this really help me throw better?"
Asked the friend as he sucked on his knuckle...
"Not really," said the atlatl psychic
"But it surely makes Reg and me chuckle!"